Are you insane like me? been in pain like me?

So, I haven’t posted in forever. I didn’t wanna post or talk about the election. I didn’t want to get into argument’s about the Inauguration. But now that it’s over, I’ve got some words. I didn’t vote for Trump. I didn’t vote for Hilary either. Some would say that a third party, or write in vote are just as bad. If you’d like to say that to my face, be my guest. 

Before I really get into this post, I’d like to make it known that I haven’t unfriended anyone from my social media(I have 365 friends, I should actually edit my list cause I don’t talk to a bunch of you). I believe you all have a right to vote for whomever you chose. Just as I do. I’m well aware that this post may not be everyone’s cup of tea, and honestly I feel that way reading a lot of what is being posted by y’all. And I understand that a bunch of people will unfriend me.This post isn’t going to bash on your beliefs, or choices.  I’m not being a judgmental butthead. I’m posting about how I’m feeling. And by unfriending me, I feel like that makes it seem as though my opinions don’t matter. I don’t plan on saying anything that will offend someone, but you never know what will. I don’t intend to get into arguments about this post, so unless you leave a comment saying how well spoken this post is, or how you agree with what is written, please don’t bother spewing hate. It’ll go ignored by myself. So, here goes…

In my soul, as a woman, I couldn’t vote for Trump. I see these posts about, “Hilary did (insert all the things she’s done that people don’t like), while Trump just said ‘mean things'”. And yeah, Hilary isn’t the best choice .  But a man who is now the President, said that it’s okay to grab a woman by the pussy. THE PUSSY! that’s who will be in office. And yeah,  I’m offended! It’s not unheard of to be offended that someone said it’s okay to grab a woman by the pussy, to take away her right to consent. To just pop some Tic Tacs, and start kissing her cause as a celebrity, your rights mean more than mine. I’m offended for myself, for my mother, for my future children, for sisters, aunts, grandmothers, best friends, all women of the world! I’m offended for the men that I know don’t talk like this. I’m offended that it easy brushed off as ‘locker room’ talk. Now we have a man that wants to abolish free health care, that wants to build a wall, that continuously spews racist and homophobic slurs, and doesn’t think climate change is real is who is now in office. (I’m not saying anything judgemental about it, those are just actual things that have been said)   And now, there are riots. There are people protesting. There are fights on Facebook where everyone can hide behind the safety of their screens. America is becoming divided when we’re at our most vulnerable. Family members arguing with each other. Friendships ending. But the worst of it, in my opinion, is the animosity in the church. My fellow believers calling a bunch of people protesting childish. Saying that the opinions of others don’t matter as much as your own. It hurts my heart so deeply when I read some of these things and it really sick because as believers, you’re giving into the stigma that nonbelievers have towards us. Live your life to be honoring to the Lord. You see people acting like fools? Pray for them. You get ‘fed up with’ all the posts about how frightened people are that Trump is president?  Pray for them! You see a video that has no context buto someone claims it’s of an anti Trump nature, and that makes you mad? What should you do?!?!?! Say it with me now- PRAY FOR THEM! That’s what we are called to do! We’re not called to judge anyone, unless you would like to take that giant log our of your eyes first.

I was told that as a white female ,  I’m the least affected. Unfortunately, that’s not true. You see, anyone with a vagina, or pussy (as the new president said ), will be affected . 

 Because yes, I take birth control .  Do I take it to have hours of crazy sex and live a baby free life? No, actually .  You see, two years ago, in September, I got my period. *if this conversation eeks you out, you don’t need to read* I have always had miserable periods, with cramps that make me want to(and at times actually) throw up and stay curled in bed, emotions that run rampant, and blood that soaks through a tampon and pad within 20 minutes .  All of this for 7 days. So I get my period in September. It goes 7 days. It’s miserable. Whatever. Then I’m done. For 3 days. Because then I start to bleed again. It was like the end of a period blood. Not miserable, but I thought I was finished?! This continues for over a month. It wasn’t until I was looking up reasons (and started panicking ), that I decided to go to get checked out. Here’s where I guess I made another HUGE mistake according to some of you. I went to Planned Parenthood. I was a 24 year old, that had just moved to a new state, was making $100 a week, and had no insurance. I made the best choice I could, with what I had. After the Doctor calmed me down and explained that I didn’t have some horrible form of cancer, we discussed that I have an unbalance of hormones and a lessened version of endometriosis. Which means that part of my uterine lining is growing *plot twist* outside of my uterus! She recommended that I get on some form of birth control, or begin taking various hormones to balance everything out. I decided to go for the cheaper (thank God, free) option, and began birth control. Now that it’s been a few years, my periods have become regular, they don’t last a month, they are still very painful because there’s not a whole lot I can do about my jacked up lining. But I don’t have to miss out on life cause I’m stuck in bed and by the toilet. Do I regret taking birth control? Nope. Do I regret going to Planned Parenthood? Heck no.  They didn’t force me to begin taking birth control. They helped me when I was broke and struggling to understand why my body was betraying me. I was so blessed by them because I was freaking out and certain something horrible was wrong and I needed my mom and they took care of me as though I was family. I got access to health care through them as well. Because while I was trying to figure out how to pay the $97 for tests and fees, they encouraged me to apply and processed my application for insurance. I do understand where a lot of people are coming from though. I do understand that abortion isn’t a form of birth control and that you’re fighting to save the lives of the unborn.  I understand that. But don’t make the people that go into Planned Parenthood feel like horrible people, because they’re not. You don’t know their life. You don’t know why they are there. You don’t have a right to judge. And while we’re on this point…  

My last post had so much about how as a believer we’re not to judge. Yet, somehow, everyone forgets that. Am I thrilled that Trump is the president ? Nope. Am i so psyched that he will take away rhe ACA? Not at all. Am I jazzed that his VP wants to put anyone in the LGBQT community into camps where they will ‘pray the gay away’? Sweet Lord, NO! Will I disrespect those that voted for him? Will I unfriend them on Facebook? Will I drag their names through the mud ? Not one bit. 

Today, millions marched for Women. For freedom. For equality. For the ability to defend what was torn down and beaten during this election. For America. If you would like to educate yourself about what the march was about, go check out the Women’s March website and mission statement. Because, well there’s a lot of disrespect going around.  I see the posts about how ‘We didn’t protest when Obama was in office’………………really? Who asked for his birth certificate? Who had anti Obama rallies that had ‘Hang in there Obama’ slogans with crude drawings and photoshopped pictures of a noose? It’s all screwed up. There will always be discontent. There will always be rallies. Today, my beautiful cousin, marched in Portland because she has beliefs.  

 This was her first time voting.  She chose to stand for the rights of women around the world, because that’s what she felt called to do. That’s how she felt her voice would be heard. And I’m so proud of her. I’m awake at almost 3 in the morning, because I have a voice. This is my freedom. This is how my voice will be heard. I’m proud of myself. With the posts going around online, I see the hate.  I see the ‘grow up’  ‘stop acting like children ‘ posts. And they aren’t as kind as the few quotes I wrote.  I agree, protests should be peaceful. Make your voice heard, but don’t damage property. Sing your fight song, but don’t ask that people ‘rape’ the new first lady.  I encourage my fellow Americans, be proud to fight for your rights, be respectful about fighting for your rights,  but absolutely continue to fight for your rights. Remember to look for the light at the end of this tunnel,  because I can promise you that it is there! Be kind to each other, because not only is that what God calls us to do, but it’s freaking nice people! Look out for each other in the coming years, because I have a feeling there will be lots of hard times. 

This election has opened the eyes of Americans to how much hate there is in the world. I don’t know how the next four years will go. But I won’t wish ill will upon Trump. I won’t hope he fails in running the country. In fact,  I hope he proves us all wrong. I hope he succeeds in growing our world, not dividing it. I pray that he does make a difference.  Because I don’t want to bring a child into the world as it is right now. I don’t want them to see this hatred going on. I don’t even want to see this hatred. For the next four years, pray. Before every post that spews hate towards someone you disagree with, pray.  When you’re feeling like this is as good as it’s gonna get, pray. Live your best life the way that works for you.  Not because someone told you to do it, but because it’s your life. You do you…boo boo 😉 

And for the love of all things holy, please choose to post pictures of cute animals and happy things. I miss those days.

Being a girl is tough, really freaking tough!

Okay, so the title says what this post is about. I’m gonna go through a few things that annoy me about being a girl, and I’m sure they annoy you too! Some of these are silly and random, some are serious and probably throw you back to a time when you experienced something similar.  A handful of young ladies in my life helped me out with a few of these!! thanks girls!!

Fair warning: if you’re a guy reading this, you should probably stop. I’m going to have a few things at the end so I’ll write in a different format when I get there to let y’all know it’s safe. There’s gonna be things on here you probably don’t wanna read. Weird things. Gross things. But it’s my blog, so deal!

That being said, the following is my list!!

1. Bobby pins and hair ties
  These freaking things…ugh. I swear. You can never find them! I can honestly say that I’ve purchased hundreds, if not thousands, of these and they disappear! It’s as though your bathroom, bedroom, and living room are the freaking Bermuda triangle! It drives me crazy. The only solution I’ve come up with is to just get packs of them at the dollar store…it doesn’t keep them around, but at least your not spending as much!

2. Not being thin enough!
   This will always be a thing! Always!! It doesn’t matter if you’re a size 0 with a great body, and muscle tone out the wahzoo. You will always think you’re not thin enough. Fun fact: you’re beautiful. You’re exactly how God planned you to be. I get that you want to go to that Zumba class, or attempt another round of hot yoga (for the love of all things holy, never do that again!), but make sure you’re doing it for you!! Which brings us to the next point!!!

3. Constantly trying to live up to societies standards.
  This is a freaking nightmare. We have always lived in a society where you need to fit into a certain mold. And if you don’t, then you ‘must’ do what it takes to get into that mold. This really freaking annoys me!!! I’m never going to fit that mold. I can assure you of that. Does that make me ugly? Does that make me less of a human being? Heck no!!! It’s like those awesome Dove commercials, I’m a real freaking woman! I don’t need a nose job, or a boob job, or liposuction to ‘ better my life’. And it annoys me that there are girls out there thinking that what society says is right is the law. I assure y’all right now, it’s not!!!

Okay, so after a few heavy topics, let’s get a random one.

4.  Waterproof makeup…primarily eye makeup.
    This is a lie. I have tried product after product, and while I don’t cry often, I cry enough to know these products lie!! I love makeup. I love testing new palettes of eyeshadow, or getting a perfect eyeliner(still searching). But when you have those moments, i.e. weddings, baby showers, funerals(hopefully not a lot of those :'(), or you’re going to a pool party and the guy you’re certain you’ll marry is gonna be there, and you need that mascara and eyeliner combo to help you through, be prepared to be let down! I can assure you, it’s typically just better to go natural and not turn into the creepy well girl from The Ring. I’m only looking out for you here. And fyi, that guy you wanna marry, most likely doesn’t care about any of it. And if he’s meant for you, he will love you even if you look like Taylor Momsen in her early Gossip Girl years.

5.  Women being sexualized by the media.
   This is a tough line. I like to go dancing, it’s awesome.  I like to drop it low. I like to get dressed up, and have fun. But as I said, there’s a line. I go out with my friends.  I’m not there for these guys to be the Robin Thicke to my Miley Cyrus. I’m never trying to be Miley…just so y’all know.  I’m there to have fun and let loose, knowing that I’m going to leave and go home by myself.  Unfortunately, because of the media making it seem that I’m out there to be grabbed and have creepy guys grind on me, I’ve had to learn to be careful. I dress for me. I dance for me. But I have to remind myself that society has been told that I’m doing it for them. So, the next time you wanna drop it low, or twerk up a storm, remember that guys are looking at you as though you’re their property. It’s probably best to dial it back and save those moves for your future husband ;p

6.  Underwire bras…really, any bra.
   Welcome to the wonderful world of women. Even if you’re not well endowed, you still know the struggle. I’m convinced that there is no perfect bra out there! You want one that provides support, but also is comfortable, but it needs to be cute, too! And then there’s also the added over boob, where it’s popping out the top, and sides. But it’s definitely your size!! And then there’s the struggle of the wires digging into you(that’s always fun). You should also avoid you’re freezer section, having your nipples show through your shirt is crazy embarrassing, or boob sweat, but if you have padding you might be covered(you’re not actually covered, sorry). And while on the note of sweat, which tends to dry out your skin, let’s talk about itchy boobs! This is a struggle because you’re typically in public when this lovely issue surfaces, and there’s only so much subtle scratching you can do before you have to go to a private place and scratch away to your hearts content!  No, just no. Finding a perfect bra is about as likely as marrying your celebrity crush.

7.  Shaving…I’m actually sad just seeing that word!
     This is a miserable feat. Especially during the summer! Guys think we overreact, and that it’s so freaking simple. Guys are wrong! It’s not just shaving your legs, oh no, you’ve got your armpits, but it doesn’t end there! If you can get away with those basic shaving areas, great, I applaud you. Realistically, you’re gonna be shaving everything…yeah, everything. Arms (if they’re hairy), legs, pits,  bikini area(most likely you’re gonna just shave everything in the downstairs region, and that’s acceptable), and I think some girls shave their backs(that’s cool, no judgement).  Now, there’s a quick process that’s been around for awhile, it’s called waxing. That can get expensive and hurt like nobodies business(especially if you’re getting the pubes pulled. *internal shudder*), so I’d recommend you stick with shaving, and if you’re being super thorough, remember to have a good razor, and lather up on shaving cream (don’t skimp on this), and some Vitamin D oil, coconut oil, or neosporin. You’re going to get bumps, it’s just a fact, no way to sugar coat it, but those will go away and you’ll be blessed with a few days of gorgeous, hair free skin!! Enjoy!

8.  Periods/PMS
   Of course this is on here. This was the main reason I created this post. I could probably write an entire post about this alone! Some of you may even be in bed with your heating pad strategically placed to fight off the cramps that you’re certain will be the death of you, right now. My friends, I feel your pain. I remember, when I was super young, thinking that getting my period would be great! It meant you were growing up, maturing…that was a harsh reality check.  I got my first period at 11, and it wasn’t too bad. Then I didn’t get it again until I was 13…when it came back, it came with a freaking vengeance!!! Cramps that feel like glass is shredding your insides, and a flow that could rival the Niagara Falls started. It’s miserable. And there’s nothing you can do about it. Tampons are best for controlling the flow and attempting to avoid leaks. However, they make the cramping worse! Then there are pads…I personally hate them.  No one actually knows you’re wearing one, but in the middle of your misery you are certain the world is aware you’ve got one on, and that adds to your delightful embarrassment. Oh, and if you’re not shaved in your nether regions, you run the risk of the glue from the pad (that can’t freaking stick to your panty) sticking to your super sensitive hairs, which you’ll usually discover while in a public restroom, where you will proceed to cry for a random amount of time. Because during this week everything will make you cry, sad movie? Cry. Dropped your cookie? Cry. Remembered your first kiss? Cry. Remembered your last kiss? Cry. Remembered the amount of time since your last kiss? Cry. Someone said something somewhat mean? Cry. Someone called you pretty? Definitely cry!  It happens. You’re probably bloated too, which means nothing fits right, you’re gonna cry about that too.  Your boobs are sore. Your exhausted and sweating from even walking to the fridge (it’s twelve feet away) to get a tub of icecream. And you’re breaking out like crazy, so you wear about a pound of foundation which doesn’t help anything and makes the zits worse!! Guys will never understand what we go through when we get our periods, and for that I hate them. But wait, there also comes the point during your period where you think guys are the greatest creation ever! It’s a rare window, it doesn’t happen to everyone, but if it does, let me warn you. It’s not that the guy is great, yes, he may have made eye contact with you for longer than the standard 3 seconds, or complimented something about you, it does not mean anything, go back to hiding, take some Midol, bust out the Half-Baked,  pop in the notebook, and paint your nails. Your ‘angry time/hell week’ will be over soon!!!

9.  Jealousy
   This one isn’t strictly a girl annoyance, but it’s primarily girls that get jealous.  It’s not always the big things that cause our jealousy. In all honesty, I get jealous over stupid things that aren’t necessarily in anyone’s control! I.e. figure, ability to dance in heels, sense of humor, etc. Then there are the typical issues of, boys, clothes, money. There are a number of things that cause jealousy. How we handle our jealousy is what helps define us. Next time you see some girl on a date with the guy you have a crush on (but have never told), go ahead and pray about it. Don’t automatically think that girl is a bad person, don’t try to ruin their date. Just realize that that isn’t the person God had meant for you and move along. Who knows, you could end up missing out on the real man of your life because you were so caught up in that jealousy!!

10. Haircuts/hair styles
   Getting haircuts has always been a nightmare for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love my hair stylist! I’m just super attached to my hair, and if I don’t like what happens to it, I’ll cry. If it’s too short, I’ll cry. Too much product? Here come the waterworks! And it usually happens when you’re supposed to be somewhere important(prom anyone?)! I was 13 when I thought I could get my hair cut like Pink(the punk/pixie cut)…oh how wrong I was. My hair is naturally curly, and I had yet to discover a straightener, so I looked like I had a fro. It wasn’t a great year. I ended up wearing bandanas all year. Not in the cute way either. I wore them to pull my hair back…it was terrible. Since then, I only get trims…though it’s rare. I just can’t go through another year of bandanas! A word of advice, if you’re getting a haircut, find a picture of what you want, talk to your stylist and make sure you can handle the upkeep of it, and wait at least two days before getting it cut. I know it grows back, but just freaking play it safe!!!

Okay guys it’s safe to read from now on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay, a super fun list. There are several more things, and I’ll most likely create another post for the many things that annoy me about being a girl. In the meantime, I want to give a quick note to the guys, if y’all stuck around. Being a girl has a bunch of issues that suck, and I’m sorry for when those issues cause us to be crazy and lash out at you. Know this, if we’re upset, if we’re crying, if we’re laughing at inappropriate times,  it doesn’t always mean we’re on our periods. When you assume that, it makes everything we’re dealing with(no matter how minute), a million times worse. For your safety, just be there and remain silent…if you have chocolate, that helps too.  😁

Thanks everyone for reading, and thank you for your input! If you have anything you wanted to know more about let me know. Love y’all!!!

-Kelsey💕

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