Leaving home is not for the lighthearted

In my 23 years it’s always been me and my momma. Yeah, there was a bit of time when I was a jerk and thought I didn’t need her…I obviously did. So, when I felt the call to move to Washington I thought it would be easy. I’ve lived on my own, I’ve had my own apartment, I’ve even gone without talking with my mother for a little bit(not really my shining moments), but my momma had always been within an hours distance. Now, that’s definitely not the case!!!!

To say I’m freaking out is an understatement. I may have been crying myself to sleep every night. It’s okay though, it’s part of my growing process.  I’ve been pushing myself to be busy as much as possible. To make new friends. To go on adventures. It’s been great! On Sunday I went to a new church, I met the youth pastor, and he happened to know my pastor and his family! Plus, a guy I met my first year of being a camp counselor happened to have moved up here a few years ago! It’s a crazy small world! After church I went to meet my family’s neighbor from Phoenix. He’s awesome! Totally welcoming, took me around town, he helped me feel like I wasn’t over 20 hours away from my family! It’s definitely helped with this transition.

When I was planning my journey I was supposed to stay with a lady for a little bit while interviewing for a handful of nanny positions. Plus, it gave me time to go apartment hunting. Unfortunately,  when I was about ten minutes away from the house, the lady called and told me that she thought about it, and that the deal we worked out wasn’t going to work for her! That really came as a shock and made me start questioning things (not really a great thing to do after driving several hours). I was upset, sad, and just about to call it quits and start my journey home! But, after speaking with my momma and my aunt, I was encouraged to push forward! One of the nanny jobs was a live-in shift, and I was contacted to do the interview once I got into town. This position seemed great when I was talking with the family. However, when I arrived things seemed to be changed, the little details were all changed, one of which was the living situation. Instead of living with a family, I would be living in a house with just the dad and the 9 year old boy. The hours were extended without anymore money being added. My bedroom had a bed in it(twin size mattress :'() and the bathroom was disgusting(think about the fact that 9 year old boys don’t aim or flush 😷😵), but I needed a place to stay. So they offered me the job, and I accepted. My first day was filled with me basically bleaching the entire bathroom and scrubbing the walls in my bedroom with bleach and Lysol. I also tried cleaning the carpet(a lovely brown shag) to no avail. It was gross!! Pretty sure I’ll be having nightmares about it for years to come.
Through all that I kept my focus on my future! I’m freaking Kelsey Hayden!! I’ve got loads of support from friends and family! But the key thing is that I’m a child of God, I’m His princess! I can do this!!! I’ve continued keeping my focus on Christ. He’s the reason I’m up here! So, this morning, after I finished my devotionals, I was praying.  I was praying that if this is where I’m supposed to be that the Lord would give me a sense of peace and understanding. I also prayed that if this wasn’t the place that I would have a sign. I was still praying when the doorbell rang! So, I ran downstairs(looking gross in yesterday’s makeup, my pjs with holes in them, and bed head that is tangled and I’m fairly certain had drool in it :/)
I opened the door, and standing there on the porch was a man that looked as though he were a Greek god! I swear, this guy was tall, tan, muscled, and his face was gorgeous! Oh my word! He was from the power company. He was there to shut off the power for nonpayment…well I did ask for a sign…so after all that I sent the guy a text telling him what was going on, he said he had paid it, and  I finished praying. Fast forward to two hours later and the power finally got turned back on!!
After all this I started applying for other jobs. Primarily live-in, since I’m still not used to the area, But I’ll be able to check out the places before agreeing to take the jobs. One of the jobs I had interviewed for before was still looking for a nanny, So I got back in touch with that family, hopefully it’ll work out! If it does, I’d start at the beginning of October.
Right now the prayer is for continued peace through this transition. Whether I’m supposed to be at this job, or the other one. Even if I get a job and apartment by myself. I still need that peace. God is good, and I’m not stressing any of this. I know He has a purpose for me, and I know I’ve got people lifting my struggles and fears up to Him. I’m blessed beyond my wildest dreams, and I’m holding onto that. I miss everyone So much and it’s hard knowing things are happening that I’m needed for but can’t actually be there for!  But this is just a new season of life for all of us!!

Love y’all, and miss y’all💕💕
~Kelsey
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