Leaving home is not for the lighthearted

In my 23 years it’s always been me and my momma. Yeah, there was a bit of time when I was a jerk and thought I didn’t need her…I obviously did. So, when I felt the call to move to Washington I thought it would be easy. I’ve lived on my own, I’ve had my own apartment, I’ve even gone without talking with my mother for a little bit(not really my shining moments), but my momma had always been within an hours distance. Now, that’s definitely not the case!!!!

To say I’m freaking out is an understatement. I may have been crying myself to sleep every night. It’s okay though, it’s part of my growing process.  I’ve been pushing myself to be busy as much as possible. To make new friends. To go on adventures. It’s been great! On Sunday I went to a new church, I met the youth pastor, and he happened to know my pastor and his family! Plus, a guy I met my first year of being a camp counselor happened to have moved up here a few years ago! It’s a crazy small world! After church I went to meet my family’s neighbor from Phoenix. He’s awesome! Totally welcoming, took me around town, he helped me feel like I wasn’t over 20 hours away from my family! It’s definitely helped with this transition.

When I was planning my journey I was supposed to stay with a lady for a little bit while interviewing for a handful of nanny positions. Plus, it gave me time to go apartment hunting. Unfortunately,  when I was about ten minutes away from the house, the lady called and told me that she thought about it, and that the deal we worked out wasn’t going to work for her! That really came as a shock and made me start questioning things (not really a great thing to do after driving several hours). I was upset, sad, and just about to call it quits and start my journey home! But, after speaking with my momma and my aunt, I was encouraged to push forward! One of the nanny jobs was a live-in shift, and I was contacted to do the interview once I got into town. This position seemed great when I was talking with the family. However, when I arrived things seemed to be changed, the little details were all changed, one of which was the living situation. Instead of living with a family, I would be living in a house with just the dad and the 9 year old boy. The hours were extended without anymore money being added. My bedroom had a bed in it(twin size mattress :'() and the bathroom was disgusting(think about the fact that 9 year old boys don’t aim or flush 😷😵), but I needed a place to stay. So they offered me the job, and I accepted. My first day was filled with me basically bleaching the entire bathroom and scrubbing the walls in my bedroom with bleach and Lysol. I also tried cleaning the carpet(a lovely brown shag) to no avail. It was gross!! Pretty sure I’ll be having nightmares about it for years to come.
Through all that I kept my focus on my future! I’m freaking Kelsey Hayden!! I’ve got loads of support from friends and family! But the key thing is that I’m a child of God, I’m His princess! I can do this!!! I’ve continued keeping my focus on Christ. He’s the reason I’m up here! So, this morning, after I finished my devotionals, I was praying.  I was praying that if this is where I’m supposed to be that the Lord would give me a sense of peace and understanding. I also prayed that if this wasn’t the place that I would have a sign. I was still praying when the doorbell rang! So, I ran downstairs(looking gross in yesterday’s makeup, my pjs with holes in them, and bed head that is tangled and I’m fairly certain had drool in it :/)
I opened the door, and standing there on the porch was a man that looked as though he were a Greek god! I swear, this guy was tall, tan, muscled, and his face was gorgeous! Oh my word! He was from the power company. He was there to shut off the power for nonpayment…well I did ask for a sign…so after all that I sent the guy a text telling him what was going on, he said he had paid it, and  I finished praying. Fast forward to two hours later and the power finally got turned back on!!
After all this I started applying for other jobs. Primarily live-in, since I’m still not used to the area, But I’ll be able to check out the places before agreeing to take the jobs. One of the jobs I had interviewed for before was still looking for a nanny, So I got back in touch with that family, hopefully it’ll work out! If it does, I’d start at the beginning of October.
Right now the prayer is for continued peace through this transition. Whether I’m supposed to be at this job, or the other one. Even if I get a job and apartment by myself. I still need that peace. God is good, and I’m not stressing any of this. I know He has a purpose for me, and I know I’ve got people lifting my struggles and fears up to Him. I’m blessed beyond my wildest dreams, and I’m holding onto that. I miss everyone So much and it’s hard knowing things are happening that I’m needed for but can’t actually be there for!  But this is just a new season of life for all of us!!

Love y’all, and miss y’all💕💕
~Kelsey
Hisfavoritestory@gmail.com

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Being a girl is tough, really freaking tough!

Okay, so the title says what this post is about. I’m gonna go through a few things that annoy me about being a girl, and I’m sure they annoy you too! Some of these are silly and random, some are serious and probably throw you back to a time when you experienced something similar.  A handful of young ladies in my life helped me out with a few of these!! thanks girls!!

Fair warning: if you’re a guy reading this, you should probably stop. I’m going to have a few things at the end so I’ll write in a different format when I get there to let y’all know it’s safe. There’s gonna be things on here you probably don’t wanna read. Weird things. Gross things. But it’s my blog, so deal!

That being said, the following is my list!!

1. Bobby pins and hair ties
  These freaking things…ugh. I swear. You can never find them! I can honestly say that I’ve purchased hundreds, if not thousands, of these and they disappear! It’s as though your bathroom, bedroom, and living room are the freaking Bermuda triangle! It drives me crazy. The only solution I’ve come up with is to just get packs of them at the dollar store…it doesn’t keep them around, but at least your not spending as much!

2. Not being thin enough!
   This will always be a thing! Always!! It doesn’t matter if you’re a size 0 with a great body, and muscle tone out the wahzoo. You will always think you’re not thin enough. Fun fact: you’re beautiful. You’re exactly how God planned you to be. I get that you want to go to that Zumba class, or attempt another round of hot yoga (for the love of all things holy, never do that again!), but make sure you’re doing it for you!! Which brings us to the next point!!!

3. Constantly trying to live up to societies standards.
  This is a freaking nightmare. We have always lived in a society where you need to fit into a certain mold. And if you don’t, then you ‘must’ do what it takes to get into that mold. This really freaking annoys me!!! I’m never going to fit that mold. I can assure you of that. Does that make me ugly? Does that make me less of a human being? Heck no!!! It’s like those awesome Dove commercials, I’m a real freaking woman! I don’t need a nose job, or a boob job, or liposuction to ‘ better my life’. And it annoys me that there are girls out there thinking that what society says is right is the law. I assure y’all right now, it’s not!!!

Okay, so after a few heavy topics, let’s get a random one.

4.  Waterproof makeup…primarily eye makeup.
    This is a lie. I have tried product after product, and while I don’t cry often, I cry enough to know these products lie!! I love makeup. I love testing new palettes of eyeshadow, or getting a perfect eyeliner(still searching). But when you have those moments, i.e. weddings, baby showers, funerals(hopefully not a lot of those :'(), or you’re going to a pool party and the guy you’re certain you’ll marry is gonna be there, and you need that mascara and eyeliner combo to help you through, be prepared to be let down! I can assure you, it’s typically just better to go natural and not turn into the creepy well girl from The Ring. I’m only looking out for you here. And fyi, that guy you wanna marry, most likely doesn’t care about any of it. And if he’s meant for you, he will love you even if you look like Taylor Momsen in her early Gossip Girl years.

5.  Women being sexualized by the media.
   This is a tough line. I like to go dancing, it’s awesome.  I like to drop it low. I like to get dressed up, and have fun. But as I said, there’s a line. I go out with my friends.  I’m not there for these guys to be the Robin Thicke to my Miley Cyrus. I’m never trying to be Miley…just so y’all know.  I’m there to have fun and let loose, knowing that I’m going to leave and go home by myself.  Unfortunately, because of the media making it seem that I’m out there to be grabbed and have creepy guys grind on me, I’ve had to learn to be careful. I dress for me. I dance for me. But I have to remind myself that society has been told that I’m doing it for them. So, the next time you wanna drop it low, or twerk up a storm, remember that guys are looking at you as though you’re their property. It’s probably best to dial it back and save those moves for your future husband ;p

6.  Underwire bras…really, any bra.
   Welcome to the wonderful world of women. Even if you’re not well endowed, you still know the struggle. I’m convinced that there is no perfect bra out there! You want one that provides support, but also is comfortable, but it needs to be cute, too! And then there’s also the added over boob, where it’s popping out the top, and sides. But it’s definitely your size!! And then there’s the struggle of the wires digging into you(that’s always fun). You should also avoid you’re freezer section, having your nipples show through your shirt is crazy embarrassing, or boob sweat, but if you have padding you might be covered(you’re not actually covered, sorry). And while on the note of sweat, which tends to dry out your skin, let’s talk about itchy boobs! This is a struggle because you’re typically in public when this lovely issue surfaces, and there’s only so much subtle scratching you can do before you have to go to a private place and scratch away to your hearts content!  No, just no. Finding a perfect bra is about as likely as marrying your celebrity crush.

7.  Shaving…I’m actually sad just seeing that word!
     This is a miserable feat. Especially during the summer! Guys think we overreact, and that it’s so freaking simple. Guys are wrong! It’s not just shaving your legs, oh no, you’ve got your armpits, but it doesn’t end there! If you can get away with those basic shaving areas, great, I applaud you. Realistically, you’re gonna be shaving everything…yeah, everything. Arms (if they’re hairy), legs, pits,  bikini area(most likely you’re gonna just shave everything in the downstairs region, and that’s acceptable), and I think some girls shave their backs(that’s cool, no judgement).  Now, there’s a quick process that’s been around for awhile, it’s called waxing. That can get expensive and hurt like nobodies business(especially if you’re getting the pubes pulled. *internal shudder*), so I’d recommend you stick with shaving, and if you’re being super thorough, remember to have a good razor, and lather up on shaving cream (don’t skimp on this), and some Vitamin D oil, coconut oil, or neosporin. You’re going to get bumps, it’s just a fact, no way to sugar coat it, but those will go away and you’ll be blessed with a few days of gorgeous, hair free skin!! Enjoy!

8.  Periods/PMS
   Of course this is on here. This was the main reason I created this post. I could probably write an entire post about this alone! Some of you may even be in bed with your heating pad strategically placed to fight off the cramps that you’re certain will be the death of you, right now. My friends, I feel your pain. I remember, when I was super young, thinking that getting my period would be great! It meant you were growing up, maturing…that was a harsh reality check.  I got my first period at 11, and it wasn’t too bad. Then I didn’t get it again until I was 13…when it came back, it came with a freaking vengeance!!! Cramps that feel like glass is shredding your insides, and a flow that could rival the Niagara Falls started. It’s miserable. And there’s nothing you can do about it. Tampons are best for controlling the flow and attempting to avoid leaks. However, they make the cramping worse! Then there are pads…I personally hate them.  No one actually knows you’re wearing one, but in the middle of your misery you are certain the world is aware you’ve got one on, and that adds to your delightful embarrassment. Oh, and if you’re not shaved in your nether regions, you run the risk of the glue from the pad (that can’t freaking stick to your panty) sticking to your super sensitive hairs, which you’ll usually discover while in a public restroom, where you will proceed to cry for a random amount of time. Because during this week everything will make you cry, sad movie? Cry. Dropped your cookie? Cry. Remembered your first kiss? Cry. Remembered your last kiss? Cry. Remembered the amount of time since your last kiss? Cry. Someone said something somewhat mean? Cry. Someone called you pretty? Definitely cry!  It happens. You’re probably bloated too, which means nothing fits right, you’re gonna cry about that too.  Your boobs are sore. Your exhausted and sweating from even walking to the fridge (it’s twelve feet away) to get a tub of icecream. And you’re breaking out like crazy, so you wear about a pound of foundation which doesn’t help anything and makes the zits worse!! Guys will never understand what we go through when we get our periods, and for that I hate them. But wait, there also comes the point during your period where you think guys are the greatest creation ever! It’s a rare window, it doesn’t happen to everyone, but if it does, let me warn you. It’s not that the guy is great, yes, he may have made eye contact with you for longer than the standard 3 seconds, or complimented something about you, it does not mean anything, go back to hiding, take some Midol, bust out the Half-Baked,  pop in the notebook, and paint your nails. Your ‘angry time/hell week’ will be over soon!!!

9.  Jealousy
   This one isn’t strictly a girl annoyance, but it’s primarily girls that get jealous.  It’s not always the big things that cause our jealousy. In all honesty, I get jealous over stupid things that aren’t necessarily in anyone’s control! I.e. figure, ability to dance in heels, sense of humor, etc. Then there are the typical issues of, boys, clothes, money. There are a number of things that cause jealousy. How we handle our jealousy is what helps define us. Next time you see some girl on a date with the guy you have a crush on (but have never told), go ahead and pray about it. Don’t automatically think that girl is a bad person, don’t try to ruin their date. Just realize that that isn’t the person God had meant for you and move along. Who knows, you could end up missing out on the real man of your life because you were so caught up in that jealousy!!

10. Haircuts/hair styles
   Getting haircuts has always been a nightmare for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love my hair stylist! I’m just super attached to my hair, and if I don’t like what happens to it, I’ll cry. If it’s too short, I’ll cry. Too much product? Here come the waterworks! And it usually happens when you’re supposed to be somewhere important(prom anyone?)! I was 13 when I thought I could get my hair cut like Pink(the punk/pixie cut)…oh how wrong I was. My hair is naturally curly, and I had yet to discover a straightener, so I looked like I had a fro. It wasn’t a great year. I ended up wearing bandanas all year. Not in the cute way either. I wore them to pull my hair back…it was terrible. Since then, I only get trims…though it’s rare. I just can’t go through another year of bandanas! A word of advice, if you’re getting a haircut, find a picture of what you want, talk to your stylist and make sure you can handle the upkeep of it, and wait at least two days before getting it cut. I know it grows back, but just freaking play it safe!!!

Okay guys it’s safe to read from now on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay, a super fun list. There are several more things, and I’ll most likely create another post for the many things that annoy me about being a girl. In the meantime, I want to give a quick note to the guys, if y’all stuck around. Being a girl has a bunch of issues that suck, and I’m sorry for when those issues cause us to be crazy and lash out at you. Know this, if we’re upset, if we’re crying, if we’re laughing at inappropriate times,  it doesn’t always mean we’re on our periods. When you assume that, it makes everything we’re dealing with(no matter how minute), a million times worse. For your safety, just be there and remain silent…if you have chocolate, that helps too.  😁

Thanks everyone for reading, and thank you for your input! If you have anything you wanted to know more about let me know. Love y’all!!!

-Kelsey💕

Hisfavoritestory@gmail.com