Being a jerk towards me will get you nowhere

I’m fairly certain that I jinxed myself. Or something along those lines.

While I was on here Tuesday, singing the praises of the Kid, the enemy was doing a freaking number on that same kids heart! UGH!!!

The past few days, I have no idea what got into this punk. But he woke up grumpy. Typically mornings are not an issue for me because the Kid is pretty independent and will deal with his own waking habits. I just need to get him a bowl of cereal… super easy!! But this time around? NOPE!! Just a grump. But whatever, he also didn’t want me to walk him to the end of the street( this was most likely since there is a girl I’m certain he likes that is there) so I let him go by himself(I can see him from the window upstairs). The main issue is when the kid gets home from school! This freaking kid has fought me tooth and freaking nail about EVERYTHING! Then he switched tactics and instead of fighting about not doing it, he’d do it, but question what I was doing all day. As though the dishes he and his father had made a mess using the night before were my issue to clean up! And why was I reading when I should have been cleaning up the living room that I’m never in?! Ugh! Freaking guy! Anyway, I proceeded to tell him he was being rude and disrespectful. But the BEST PART, is that on Wednesday, he refused to come in from playing outside to clean his room , and I had to go outside and get him, and he stood on the front yard yelling that he didn’t have to listen to me, while I told him if he didn’t he would end up having to deal with his dad, and we got the neighborhood gossips staring at the whole thing, this freaking kid tells me he “hates” me! FREAKING HATES ME! So, obviously I replied with, “I don’t care. Get in the house!”, which worked. Then once inside I discover that I’m “the meanest babysitter ever!” and “never” let the kid have fun! Oh jeez! I was done at that point. The dad, thank God, got home about fifteen minutes later, and was informed immediately that I was hated and the meanest. Now, the dad went to the kids room and ten minutes later they both come downstairs. The kid(with tears in his eyes) apologizes and lets me know that he doesn’t hate me and I’m not the meanest. Then the dad lets him know that if he acts like that again, he’ll get just about all his “privileges” taken away. After that I left to run errands, pretty much anything was better than being there!! 

So after all that, the kid isn’t exactly jumping at the chance to be my BFF, he’s actually continued to be antagonistic, but it really doesn’t matter to me. I need a job. I need a place to live. Even if it’s only temporary, I’m going to continue to power through. Until I can find something else. I’m staying. UGH! Being an adult is a stupid thing, and I reject it.

On a happier note!
IT’S Q&A TIME!!!!!

I got hit with some questions from a few readers. And some from my youth girls. The following are the answers!!

BOOM!

QUESTION 1: What do you do when you’re bored?

Well, when I’m bored I do a medley of things. I’ll text some friends to see what they’re up to(usually they’re bored as well). Or, I’ll put in a movie, or watch one on Netflix. I’ll go on a run. I’ll curl up with a good book. I’ll actually take time to do my makeup and hair. Or, I’ll go take a nap. When I’m bored, I do boring things. #livingthelife

QUESTION 2: Who is your celebrity crush?

It changes based on what I watch them in. My go to guy is Orlando Bloom!! OMG that man! Followed by Viggo Mortensen(I would wife him so hard). Harrison Ford is a freaking FOX(yes, I am aware of the age difference). I’m sure there a bunch more…I know there are. But I will limit myself to those I mentioned. 

QUESTION 3: Are you a good dancer?

I like to think so! In theory, I have the moves of those on So You Think You Can Dance. In reality, I just like to move! I really never care if people think I can dance or not. And anyone out there that hasn’t gone out on a dance floor to bust a move because they were worried about what others would think, GET OVER IT! Go on that floor! Lose yourself to that beat! It doesn’t matter if you look like a complete dork! Most people do! Have the confidence to be your own person! Most others will join in as long as you’re having fun, it doesn’t matter what others think.

QUESTION 4: Who, and where, was your first kiss?

HAHAHA 

Okay, so this one is odd. My first kiss was a lovely chaste kiss when I was just a kid and didn’t actually know what I was doing with a childhood friend named Stephen, in my moms closet. I don’t actually know why we were there. Or, why we decided to kiss. Or, how we knew what to do. But I do remember it was pretty perfect in my little kid mind!

QUESTION 5: What’s something, or someone you miss most from your childhood?

My Grandma. I was lucky to get a few years with her. She passed before I turned three, and though most would think that you wouldn’t remember something from that age, I do. I remember she was sick. I remember going to an appointment with her and my mom, and she pulled me onto the exam table to sit on her lap, and told me she loved me and would always be watching out for me. I remember she had a heart that was so full of love, especially near the end. I miss her the most. I hold onto those words, and I know she meant them. I know when I’m having crappy days and something awesome turns it around that she played a part in it. I know when I cry she tries to hold me in her own way. I know she’s there. I know she’s sticking to what she said to me all those years ago. 

QUESTION 6: Have you ever ridden on a motorcycle, ATV, or motocross bike?

Oh jeez, all of the above. My uncle used to have a Harley, and took me on a ride one time through Phoenix! It rocked!! I had a group of friends in school that rode motocross and let me ride their bikes a few times, but after seeing them crash and having to recover so much I realized it wasn’t for me. And an ATV, I’ve ridden a few times. The last time was a week before my 18th birthday and me and my friend crashed and ended up going to the hospital. She had a skull fracture, some cuts, and bruises. I had a dislocated shoulder, cracked ribs, cuts, and bruises. Pretty much the last time I will ever be on one of those!!

QUESTION 7: Did you ever have an imaginary friend as a child?

Yes. I don’t remember actually having one. But my mother swears I did. She said her name was Nancy, and I don’t know many other details. Lol children are odd.

QUESTION 8: Have you ever fallen for a character in a book?

Pretty much every male character! Honestly, some of my favorite authors create these guys that are the dream guy for me! Unfortunately, that’s all they are. A dream. But I do love getting drawn into a story where a character will make you feel and relate to his struggles, and therefore want to ‘fix’ those struggles for him. Haha. 

QUESTION 9: What do you think are the most important traits to look for in a guy?

Does he love Jesus? That’s pretty much it! Seriously, everyone has different preferences in what they want in a guy! I want a guy that’s tall, respects his mom, treats me like a princess, has great hygiene, and makes me laugh every single day! But if he doesn’t put Christ first in any relationship, then he isn’t the guy for me. I’m not willing to lower my standards. If that means I stay single for a little bit longer, so be it. That’s what I’m looking for. That’s what I’ll wait for.

QUESTION 10: Do you still think about your first love?

This one is actually tough, mainly because I can’t honestly say I’ve been in love with any of the guys I dated. Now, before you get all judge, let me explain. The first guy that I was ever with was not a good situation. It was a horrible thing, and I will save that story for another day, but he tried to convince me that the horrible things he put me through were because he loved me. Therefore, I tried to justify what was happening as love. It wasn’t, for the record. It was lust. Those two emotions get so mixed and clouded that it is hard to tell the difference. Looking back I realize what it was, I realize that I never loved him. Yeah, there will always be that ‘tie” there. But it wasn’t love. I think I’m still looking for my first (and hopefully only) love.

That’s all the for the Q&A this week. There were a few more that I wanted to answer, but I’ll keep those for next week! As always, keep sending me questions! I love answering them. I love you all and miss you all. Feel free to also email me prayer requests, and testimonies! I LOVE reading those! One day I will share my entire testimony. But yours are so very awesome and I love that you’re open to sharing your lives with me. You’re all awesome! Until next time!!

-Kelsey💕💕
Hisfavoritestory@gmail.com
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Working towards living an infinitely better life

I have finally found some downtime!! Woohoo

Okay, so in reality I’ve had downtime. But I chose to read instead of updating everyone on the goings on in my life. Which, now that I think about it, is kind of a jerk move on my part. So, I’m sorry.

Today has been pretty great, yesterday was the freaking best!! 

The reason today has been great is because it’s been cloudy and pouring rain like crazy! I’ve basically been in heaven. Plus, it was my easy day at work cause all I had to do was get the kid to the bus stop this morning and I was done! 

But yesterday! Let me tell you about that life! Actually I have to give you a quick recap of last week then you’ll understand more about why yesterday was such a breakthrough.

So last week, I had a cold! It was pure misery. I felt blah before I took off for Washington, but my body was going through so much stress that other issues took precedent. Then, when I finally settled for a bit, it hit me! Hard! I was dealing with the sore throat, body aches, chest congestion, stuffy nose, and hacking up a lung coughing misery. I was feeling it last weekend, and last Monday it got me. Also on Monday, my kid was being a freaking punk(not the word I want to use, so use your imagination). He got home from school and didn’t want to do his homework. Which doesn’t roll well with me, since the first week I started him on a schedule! I’ll post it below, I hasn’t been written out ever, but the kid knows what it is.

SCHEDULE(AS MADE BY KELSEY HAYDEN, CHANGES MUST BE APPROVED BY HER AS WELL)

3:30-3:45 Kid gets home from school. Has fifteen minuets to chill out, find a snack, and generally unwind from a hectic day of 3rd grade.

3:45 Kid starts homework. Literally one page of 3rd grade math. Kid knows that depending on how long he takes to do his homework, and how much he complains, he will get time either added or subtracted from his free time(typically an hour).

4:20-5 Free time!!! He usually just plays video games. But sometimes, he’ll actually go outside and live life in the fresh air!

5-5:20 Reading time. This is followed by a quick five minute summary of what he read, which needs to be written in a school journal.

Once that’s all finished he’s free to do whatever until his dad gets home. Easy Peasy!

Okay, so now you know the schedule. 

Last Monday, the kid came home from Scholl and refused to do homework, refused to speak to me other than in grunts or glares. I suggested he clean off the living room table which he was doing when he made a jerk comment about me ‘never doing anything’ around the house. This was said after I wasn’t home all weekend and came back a kitchen full of dirty dishes which I proceeded to clean because that’s how I was raised. To say I was mad, is so understated it’s not even funny. I gave the kid a chance to say it louder, which he realized would have been unwise, I gave him a chance to take it back, which he sarcastically did. Then his neighbor friends wanted to play which I said no to because he needed to do his homework. Did he listen? Nope! He walked right out the door. When he finally came back in he ran upstairs and slammed doors since I told him I’d be discussing the whole afternoon with his father. So when the dad finally got there. I started to tell him the whole deal. But when I got to the part where the kid told me I didn’t do anything, he flipped! He went inside, there was yelling, brought the kid out and made him apologize. I appreciated it. But my voice started going away, and the dad took note of that and said I should go get some rest. I did, he brought me a rockin dinner of chicken Alfredo. I took whatever Nyquil I had, and that was that. The next day was an easy Tuesday, so I got the kid to the bus and went into my Nyquil coma. I woke around the time that the kid would get back from school, and the dad was already home. He handed me a glass of Orange juice, told me he picked up some chicken noodle soup, and handed me a bag with Nyquil. He also told me he was off the next day so I didn’t need to get up early!! I may, or may not, have cried upon entering my bedroom…we all know I totally did! How could I not?! Someone, who had no reason to, was taking care of me!! It was really nice.

Anyway, fast forward to yesterday. I’m finally feeling better. I was feeling better Friday, but stayed closer to the house instead of exploring cause I didn’t want to push it. In the morning, kid woke up. No issues. No grumbling. Nothing. Good start for me!! I got in some intense Zumba, did some core exercises, showered and ran errands(where I met a cute guy that I’m going out with on Saturday, but that’s a story for another time). When I got back I took a power nap. Life was truly spectacular! Then the kid came home, took out his homework, sat at the table and did it. But let’s not forget that while he was sitting down he asked me how my day had been!!!:mrgreen::mrgreen: I was shocked. But I figured I would just wait and see what he wanted. So, he finished his homework. In ten minutes! I let him have an hour and a half of play time. While he was playing video games in his room, I was in mine reading. Five minutes before his time was up I was about to go get him, but I heard the game shut off…I walked out to the living room to find him already reading!!!!! It was way too good to be true. So I asked what had gotten into him. He proceeded to tell me he wanted to have a good day. I mentioned that keeping it up would be appreciated and he agreed! He finished his reading, wrote his summary, and asked if he could go play. I asked if he’d take out the trash.  He did. Without complaining. At all!! I was truly impressed.

After that, the dad and I sat down. He told me that when I’m there, I’m in charge. If the kid is disrespectful, call him out on it. If he’s slamming doors, take away games. Then the dad asked if I was comfortable. We talked about how I was freaking out the first week but I was finding my bearings. And finally, we discussed the fact that they’re moving in November and they want me to move with them. So, come November, I’ll be going further North to Bellevue. It’s gonna be interesting, and I’m praying about what this means church wise. But as always, God is in control!! And I’m following His lead!! There’s so much more I have to tell you about this week. But I’m exhausted and gonna go ahead and crash. Just know that I’m safe. I’m working on finding my happiness. And I love you guys!!

-Kelsey 💕💕
Hisfavoritestory@gmail.com

Also, I’ve been asked a few questions on my e-mail, so I’ll be answering those soon too!!

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Leaving home is not for the lighthearted

In my 23 years it’s always been me and my momma. Yeah, there was a bit of time when I was a jerk and thought I didn’t need her…I obviously did. So, when I felt the call to move to Washington I thought it would be easy. I’ve lived on my own, I’ve had my own apartment, I’ve even gone without talking with my mother for a little bit(not really my shining moments), but my momma had always been within an hours distance. Now, that’s definitely not the case!!!!

To say I’m freaking out is an understatement. I may have been crying myself to sleep every night. It’s okay though, it’s part of my growing process.  I’ve been pushing myself to be busy as much as possible. To make new friends. To go on adventures. It’s been great! On Sunday I went to a new church, I met the youth pastor, and he happened to know my pastor and his family! Plus, a guy I met my first year of being a camp counselor happened to have moved up here a few years ago! It’s a crazy small world! After church I went to meet my family’s neighbor from Phoenix. He’s awesome! Totally welcoming, took me around town, he helped me feel like I wasn’t over 20 hours away from my family! It’s definitely helped with this transition.

When I was planning my journey I was supposed to stay with a lady for a little bit while interviewing for a handful of nanny positions. Plus, it gave me time to go apartment hunting. Unfortunately,  when I was about ten minutes away from the house, the lady called and told me that she thought about it, and that the deal we worked out wasn’t going to work for her! That really came as a shock and made me start questioning things (not really a great thing to do after driving several hours). I was upset, sad, and just about to call it quits and start my journey home! But, after speaking with my momma and my aunt, I was encouraged to push forward! One of the nanny jobs was a live-in shift, and I was contacted to do the interview once I got into town. This position seemed great when I was talking with the family. However, when I arrived things seemed to be changed, the little details were all changed, one of which was the living situation. Instead of living with a family, I would be living in a house with just the dad and the 9 year old boy. The hours were extended without anymore money being added. My bedroom had a bed in it(twin size mattress :'() and the bathroom was disgusting(think about the fact that 9 year old boys don’t aim or flush 😷😵), but I needed a place to stay. So they offered me the job, and I accepted. My first day was filled with me basically bleaching the entire bathroom and scrubbing the walls in my bedroom with bleach and Lysol. I also tried cleaning the carpet(a lovely brown shag) to no avail. It was gross!! Pretty sure I’ll be having nightmares about it for years to come.
Through all that I kept my focus on my future! I’m freaking Kelsey Hayden!! I’ve got loads of support from friends and family! But the key thing is that I’m a child of God, I’m His princess! I can do this!!! I’ve continued keeping my focus on Christ. He’s the reason I’m up here! So, this morning, after I finished my devotionals, I was praying.  I was praying that if this is where I’m supposed to be that the Lord would give me a sense of peace and understanding. I also prayed that if this wasn’t the place that I would have a sign. I was still praying when the doorbell rang! So, I ran downstairs(looking gross in yesterday’s makeup, my pjs with holes in them, and bed head that is tangled and I’m fairly certain had drool in it :/)
I opened the door, and standing there on the porch was a man that looked as though he were a Greek god! I swear, this guy was tall, tan, muscled, and his face was gorgeous! Oh my word! He was from the power company. He was there to shut off the power for nonpayment…well I did ask for a sign…so after all that I sent the guy a text telling him what was going on, he said he had paid it, and  I finished praying. Fast forward to two hours later and the power finally got turned back on!!
After all this I started applying for other jobs. Primarily live-in, since I’m still not used to the area, But I’ll be able to check out the places before agreeing to take the jobs. One of the jobs I had interviewed for before was still looking for a nanny, So I got back in touch with that family, hopefully it’ll work out! If it does, I’d start at the beginning of October.
Right now the prayer is for continued peace through this transition. Whether I’m supposed to be at this job, or the other one. Even if I get a job and apartment by myself. I still need that peace. God is good, and I’m not stressing any of this. I know He has a purpose for me, and I know I’ve got people lifting my struggles and fears up to Him. I’m blessed beyond my wildest dreams, and I’m holding onto that. I miss everyone So much and it’s hard knowing things are happening that I’m needed for but can’t actually be there for!  But this is just a new season of life for all of us!!

Love y’all, and miss y’all💕💕
~Kelsey
Hisfavoritestory@gmail.com